I met this girl named Jessica, and she was absolutely the world to me. She would always have this angelic face that made me smile, always made me laugh, and cheered me up through the darkest of times.. There was no other girl like her on the face of the earth. She was truly one in a million..

When I am with her, nothing feels like it's real. Everything feels like a dream, and I never want to wake up out of it. She she's close to me, my heart beats like there's no tomorrow, and when she calls my name, I'd come running a marathon for her. It's not easy for me to say this, and my hands are trembling as I'm writing this. But she was someone I truly loved. She TAUGHT me how to love because no other girl has made me feel this way. I was insanely head over heels for her, and I'm proud to say it.

Months went by with her and I can almost relive every moment of it. The months with her were things I can't even explain. They meant so much to me, and brought me so much happiness and I didn't give a fuck for school, stress, parents or w/e. It just made me focus on her and only her. Unlike many other couples, we went by 7 months without a fight or anything of that source. It was to me the perfect relationship. However things started changing.. We couldn't get to talk to each other every night because of limitations, and this just got plain hard. A week after our 7th month.. I guess she couldn't handle the hardness of it all, and things ended there on 1.27.09.. The pain was like no other.. Those words pierced through my body like butter, and the feeling.. was just unbearable. I'm not doing this blog to say how bad a person she is, but that how GREAT a person she is. She's changed my life in so many ways, that I wouldn't be the same person I would be right now. She taught me how to actually care for someone so close to you. Taught me how to love someone in that way.. So even though we're apart, I just want you to know how much you still mean to me.. I'll be okay, but you still hold a special place in my heart that I don't think I can ever throw away..

So now all you know about Jessica Pan, and what a wonderful person she is. Those of you who met her can probably agree with me that she's simply amazing. Thanks for being a part of my life Jessica, and I'll never be able to forget you no matter how hard I try.

-Brandon


Hey everyone! It's been so long since I last updated this.. A lot has happened and I've just been too caught up with my daily busy life lol..

Finals have just ended for the first semester of the school year, and I have not felt such relief in a long time. Things have been the same pretty much, people come and go, the crazy parents, regular school drama, etc. I guess I've grown accustomed to that to a point where it doesn't bother me as much anymore. I guess that's good in a way =] Besides from that.. Lately I've been having... doubts about something.. I don't know what it is, but it's been keeping me awake all night thinking, wondering. I mean, I don't know how to explain this really.. so I'm sorry if I'm being very vague about this hehe..

I guess this just started recently, some people have been acting differently towards me, but these people aren't just any other people. It's like.. we've been close for so long, and out of no where, something seems off, different, out of place.. We've been close for such a long time, so how come things start changing? It feels like people are growing tired of me.. like after they've had enough of me they throw me aside ya'know? I guess I should be kinda used to this, but coming from close friends of mine? That's not something I can take in so easily.. I'm not gonna say much more about this since I'll probably give the whole thing away.. This blog is simply for venting out my feelings that have been the one thing added to the tons of stress that I have right now. I really would appreciate it if people wouldn't start asking me things such as "oh what's wrong, what's happening" etc etc. If you take the time to read this particular blog, I thank you sincerely for caring enough to read it, but just let it be at that for this time okay? This isn't really an issue I want to talk about with other people.

Thanks again to all of you who follow/take the time to read these >< Means a lot to me, fo'reals!
Now that finals are over, probably gonna be updating this a lot more. Till next time =]

-Brandon